Pink Giraffe Musing

Everything I ever needed to know, I learned at Boot Camp.......... When I was 38 and then again when I was 39, I had a plan.  Sort of a plan.  A plan that resided inside my head and was known only to me.  A plan to get fit by the time I was 40.  A plan that I acted out in no way, and told no one about.  Thirty-eight came and went, and so did thirty-nine and then I found myself kind of fat and 40.  Not only fat and 40; fat, forty and gaining.  I had been holding steady at my post baby weight for quite some time, until the winter months of 2010-2011, when the scale began creeping frighteningly upward.  Now, fat is a relative term, and subject of much debate in our culture, so I am going to say fat for me.  My whole life I was "skinny".  It was part of my identity. That skinny girl with the blond hair…..that was me.  I used to hate being called skinny, until I saw myself as fat.  That seemed much worse.  Clothes didn'...

In February 2011, I started an incredible journey of health, fitness, strength, and smaller clothes sizes.  I know I said, and I'm pretty sure I wrote, that if I could get back to the way I looked at 18 that I'd never let it go.  I lied.  I got there.  I shocked myself, to be sure.  Actually, I think there was a window of time where I was more fit than I had ever been in my entire life.  I mean, I had muscles, real muscles.  Little ones, but you could see them.   In no time, I let it slip away.  Not entirely.  But, enough.  My pre-February 2011 pants would still fall of me, but at the start of this summer I was down to only one regular push up, and I hardly ever run anymore.  The physical strength I had worked so hard to gain was dwindling. In February of 2012, I was in the best physical condition of my adult life, which is a nice place to be at 41.  My kids were doing well, my husband had a job he loved, and was g...

In May I wrote this...... "I wish I was a runner, but I am not a runner. First of all, it is hot here. And second of all, I don't like to run, at all....not for long distances. I wish I did....it is cheap and accessible, but I am not self motivated enough to be a runner. This I know." But, I guess that isn't true after all. Because, I have been running. Not a lot. Not fast. And, I am not great at it. But I am running. I may never run a marathon, and I am fairly certain that I don't aspire to, but I can run. Just a little. Enough. Sometimes, there is something childlike about running. Joyful even. When my bunions aren't killing me, anyway. If there is a breeze, and it isn't a zillion degrees, a good song is on, and I have just passed a patch of honeysuckle, I want to close my eyes and turn in circles and sing....I don't, but I feel like at some point while I am running most days. As a mother, what I think I like best about running is that for however lo...

I have never been strong. As a kid I was always skinny. And, admittedly a picky eater -- I hated cheese of all kinds, condiments, especially mayo. If I had a nickel for every time my Grandma said to me, "You eat like a bird", well you know, I'd be rich. Imagine my glee when I learned in science one day that a bird eats twice it's weight each day! I could barely wait for the next family dinner, the inevitable comment, and my reply. I can still see it in my mind. My grandparents, great Aunt Betty, parents, sister.....all assembled and someone had to say it...."Beth, you eat like a bird". Oh, it was a glorious moment! In high school, I had to lift weights so that I could propel the ball from the serving line over the net in volleyball. In basketball, my coach made me use a weighed ball to do passing drills to help me build up muscle. I am not sure it ever worked. I remained thin -- skinny. I remember some boys in high school telling me my arms looked like a p...