TOTY: Humbled and Honored

I think I am an unusual teacher.  I hated high school.  Not basketball, musicals, chorus, art or dances, just the rest of it. Maybe not hated.  I think I was just disinterested in most of what I was required to learn. Indifferent perhaps?  Sometimes I just opted to take a C rather than study something I didn't really care about.  Looking back, I guess it was bad and I do wish I had a better recall of history, but I can't say it has held me back in my life.  Let's just say I was never one of those little girls who wanted to be a teacher her whole life.

While I "hated" school, I loved art.  And lucky for me, my Junior and Senior year, it was a double period.  My high school also offered Humanities, so that was another class that I found interesting and meaningful (art, history, literature and music).  Today, there are kids at every school just like me.  Students who sit through biology, and algebra, and whatever else the state says they must know just biding their time until they get to art (or band, chorus, orchestra, drama.....).  As an art teacher, it is a privilege to "understand" these kids, and to provide them with the class that is their place to shine, to lead, and to be themselves.  I love that about what I do.  I see it even at the elementary level.  I have students who don't know English well but can translate their thoughts into visual images that amaze.  Or students that struggle socially, or don't write well, but wow can they draw.

In truth, I wish I could say that is why I became an art teacher.  The real truth is that my 10th grade art teacher said I would be a good art teacher and I never considered anything else.  The wonderful thing is that she was right, I did make a good art teacher.  I don't say this out of pride. It is what I am good at.  I have more confidence in myself as an art teacher than I do anything else (even motherhood, especially motherhood).  If there was a show like Cupcake Wars, where they gave you a list of standards to teach, a random pile of sticks, glue, scraps of felt, and TP rolls....... maybe some paint and tape, and 30 minutes to create a lesson, I feel certain I would win.  I am good at it.  It is easy for me.  Things POP into my head.  It's fun and it's exciting.  Clearly, it is what I am meant to do with my life.

This year, I was voted by my peers as the Teacher of the Year for my elementary school.  Earlier this week, I was honored at a breakfast and Pep Rally for all the Teacher's of the Year in my county....about 125 teachers.  Each teacher selected 10 or so students to attend, cheer them on, and show support (so 1250 screaming children!!!).  It blew my mind.  It was a lot of people.  It was loud. It was invigorating.  It was amazing to watch these kids cheering and screaming like they would for LeBron or Beyonce' for THEIR TEACHERS.  They were jumping up and down, straining their little necks, screaming with pure joy -- for their teachers!! As each teacher was given their award, I reveled in finding their little batch of cheerful students, waving their arms madly and screaming out, waving signs, or noisemakers.  It was nothing short of amazing.  It exceeded my every expectation!

I spotted my little crew trying to find me in the masses.  I could see them scanning the crowd, and then their expressions changing from searching to joy and pure exuberance!  WHAT AN HONOR. I will never forget it.  I cry every time I tell someone about it.  Me?  You are THAT excited to see me? You are jumping around and screaming like a girl in the 60's watching the Beatles, for me?  I get misty eyed even writing about it.

As teachers, we are used to being the ones giving out the lessons and the love.  On that day, I was on the receiving end and I was so very humbled.  Humbled to be important and worthy of so much love from these precious kids.  My heart was so full!  I realized that I am blessed to provide them with a place where they are the stars, the leaders, where they feel confident, and capable.  My perspective about my job changed a little, and in a good way.

That morning, one of the speakers talked about the honor given to us by our co-workers.  In my busy life, I am not sure I had really spent enough time thinking about that.  Other teachers bestowed this honor on me.  I'll admit I teared up again because I am truly honored that my peers think I am a good art teacher (just like Mrs. Esaray told me I would be).   I appreciate that they think what I do matters (because I do teach art after all) and has an impact on their students, because I sure do try.  I can't really put in to words how I feel about being chosen by the staff of my school.  Humbled and honored I suppose.  :)

I returned to school today invigorated.  I had a level or enthusiasm that I haven't had for a while.  I had the best day.  I loved my job, and I saw the kids with new eyes.  Eyes that can't stop getting teary.